What if God Had a Facebook Page

What if God Had a Facebook Page?

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            Name: God, The Almighty

            Born:  Not really, always been around

            Studied:  No need to, all knowing

            Occupation:  Creator and a number of other things

            Interests:  You name it, most everything

            Friends:  All who wish to follow or who like me (but prefer love)

What’s On Your Mind?

            Well a lot lately.  I am sure concerned about my people.  There is so much division among them especially when it comes to religion.  Don’t you people out there in Facebook Land know that I am more interested in what religion was created for than in religion?

            I am the creator of life.  People create religion and that’s fine as long as it is a means to an end and not an end in itself.  Religion is the plumbing that gets water to people.  It seems so often that people worship the pipes and forget that I am interested in thirsty people finding water.

            The history of the way people fight over religion really gets me.  I am bigger than any container you make to try to put me in.  So many times religion ends up being a way people think they can control or contain me. It is just not going to happen; never has, never will. 

            Back in the old days I would not allow those who discovered me to even say my name.  By the way my middle name is Mystery not The Man Upstairs or Copilot.  People can never fully understand me that is why it is called “faith.”  I am not in any one book or in any one place or even in any one religion.  I am bigger than that.

            Religion is fine if it helps people realize that they did not come from some catalogue or that they are some kind of commodity.  Each person is crafted by me.  And yes sometimes things do not come out even as I want.  There are people who struggle from the very beginning with all sorts of handicaps and challenges.

            I love them even more than those of my people who think they are whole.  Things do not always get worked out on this side of eternity.  By the way there is eternity you know.  That is where I fix what is not fixed on this side, trust me.  People really have a hard time with trusting me but remember my middle name is Mystery so folks will just have to deal with that if they want the real me and not those little gods that are often substitutes.

            I will stop now even though I could go on and on.  There is always something on my mind after all but mostly my people are always on my mind.  At the center of all Creation there is pure love.  That is me and where you find real love you will find me.  Keep trying out there in Facebook Land.  I am always paying attention.

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Jesus in the Olympics

What if Jesus was in the Olympics?  Think about it.  It might go like this:

Jesus barely passed his drug test to get into the Olympic games because even though he was accused by some of being high a few nights before the test the results seemed to be a false positive.  Some said the high came from some wine he consumed but the only thing found in his room were some bottles of water.  Some others were overheard commenting, "But you can't believe what he can do with water if given a chance."

The "water to wine" thing is of no use since there is not a competition in that field although if there was one it seems that Jesus would sure have the edge.  Anyway back to the actual competition.

Jesus passed the time trials to get to the finals.  His first trial came in the "Temptation" contest.  He was matched against a former champion from the Evil Empire.  Many were worried that Jesus would not complete the contest because he refused to eat for forty days before the actual event.  Unlike the horse jumping going on down the venue, Jesus had to "overcome" three obstacles.

The Evil Empire contestant knowing full well of Jesus ability to do the water to wine thing put before him the chance to turn stones into bread.  The odds makers were pretty sure he could do it but Jesus refused on grounds that he did not need magic to win the contest.

Next came the platform diving competition but this time it was not in the pool of water that other contestants were accustomed to but from the pinnacle of the Temple.  The Evil Empire guy offered Jesus  the opportunity to do a three and half cut-away with a twist in the pike position.  Jesus whispered something like, "That would be a piece of cake but sine I did not even make the bread a few moments ago I'll pass on the cake."  Jesus then walked away from the platform again disappointing his adversary.

Next came the final trial before the big event.  The Evil Empire captain offered Jesus a gold medal without ever even competing.  The only catch was the Jesus would have to defect to the Evil Empire.  The captain of the Evil Empire team then showed Jesus how he would be greeted with a ticker-tape parade back home in the Empire if only he would go ahead and take the medal thus avoiding all the upcoming demands of a grueling competition.

Jesus held the medal in his hand as it glistened in the noonday sun.  He smiled and handed it back to the captain and simply said something like, "Not today my worthy opponent; not today and not ever."

So Jesus wins his first preliminary heat.  Now it is time for the real events.  He has to hurriedly recruit a team but word has it that all the first round picks are long gone.  He will have to pick from the left overs.

His chances of winning the gold in the the area of Religious Truth seems almost impossible.  At least he has the consolation that he won a medal in the Temptation contest.

The captain of the Evil Empire team was overheard saying as he walked away, "Just you wait and see.  He will loose in the end.  His team will never come through and I know the judges.  His scores will be so low there will be no more medals in his future."

Reporters could not find Jesus for an interview.  Someone said that he went to talk things over with his Dad but others said that his father was not supposed to even show up at the Olympics.  Only time will tell.  Meanwhile according to the schedule Jesus is next up to compete in the Love Marathon.  Many think he does not have a chance especially with the kind of diet he often follows.  Others say he has a real chance since the route of the race goes next to a large body of water.  He has been known to run not by it but across it thus saving a good deal of time.

Pope Francis for President

So now that I am retired and "free" I'm thinking about becoming a Catholic.  I really like Pope Francis.  In fact I am nominating him for President.  Forget the need to be born in America.  We need real leadership no matter what the birth certificate says.  Well, I know that in North Carolina the birth certificate thing is the topic of yet another issue, which by the way also could use some real leadership.

Anyway back to my campaign for Pope Francis.  Recently at a "leadership" conference Pope Francis urged the many thousands of young people there to "take a risk, because life is not meant to be tucked away."  He then said, "People may judge you to be dreamers because you believe in a new humanity, one that rejects hatred  between peoples, one that refuses to see borders as barriers and can cherish its own traditions without being self-centered or small-minded."  Wow, what a breath of fresh air.  We sure need that kind of vision in an American where a lot of people are so angry and frustrated that  they seem willing to follow a kind of leadership model that is "self-centered and small-minded."

In terms of me switching denominations perhaps I am jumping ship too soon but I sure like what the Pope said about God at this same setting.  He said that negativity was a "virus infecting and blocking everything."  He must be keeping up with our recent political scene.  He then advocated that the young people there remember to hold on to the real God.  Then he offered some really good insight into what the real God is like.  I mean he is the Pope, he's supposed to know such things.

Pope Francis said, "Trust the memory of God: His memory is not a hard disk that saves and archives all our data, but a heart filled with tender compassion."  Maybe he can't be President but I am sure glad he won his own election.  We need someone telling who God is rather than some of the word-smiths who seem to know a God I care not to know.

So I suppose I will remain Methodist, at least for now, although we Methodist seem to have our own set of barriers when it comes to including people.  We have been "fighting" over what it means to be a sexual being for what seems like an eternity.  When the Pope was asked about this issue a few months back he simply said, "Who am I to judge?"  Someone was overheard responding, "You're the Pope, for Christ's sake!"

Well yes it seems he is the Pope "for Christ's sake" and not just for the church's sake.  The Pope for President.  He uses only one e mail server, or does he even do e mails?  He is interested in building bridges rather than walls.  His "spin doctor" died of natural causes years ago so he tells the truth whether church leaders like it or not.  He loves to kiss and bless babies so see he knows the political ways.

So I'm e mailing him and signing up to be his campaign manager.  I have time now.  So here is his first slogan:  "Francis, Francis; he's our man.  He can do it better than what we presently have can!"  I am also volunteering to be his speech writer, although I tend to think he does not need one.  I have some one liners for him though:  "Let's make American humble again"....or..."Working with you!"   And by the way I already know his "platform."  You can find it in the words of his namesake; "Lord make me an instrument of your peace...."  Look up the rest.  It is time tested and works if tried.  The Pope for President!

An Interview with a Butterfly

So I am out cutting the grass the other day and this beautiful swallowtail butterfly landed on a radiant purple flower.  The yellow and black winged creature looked simply majestic as it drew some needed nourishment from its perch.

That's when it happened.  I turned off the lawnmower as I listened to what I at first thought was the wind blowing through the flower garden:

Butterfly:  Did you now I can eat and look over my "shoulder" at the same time?
Me:  What?  I mean is that you?
B:  Well, it's sure not the flower.  Well I mean flowers can speak but you have to know how to listen and you two legged beings simply do not know how to listen.  Why you can't even listen to each other much less the nature you walk around and over all the time.
M:  You are mighty presumptuous for someone to whom I have not even been introduced.
B:  Excuse me.  I spoke to you earlier but that monster of a machine you are sitting on makes the most awful noise so you could not hear me for sure.  You two legged creatures are mostly noise makers you know.  So now that you have cut it off I will tell you my name.  It is Suwah.  It means breeze carrier in butterfly language.  So what's on your mind noisy one?
M:  You started the conversation.  What do you mean what's on "my" mind?
B:  You noise makers always have something on your mind.  That is another reason you do not hear or see beings like me.  Your minds are too full to take in what is around you.
M:  Since we are talking...I mean I guess we are talking...I've always wanted to ask this question.  How do you feel about working so hard to get here and then only living for less than a month.  I hear that some of your relatives only live a few days.  I may be noisy but I am not stupid.  I know that you start as an egg on a leaf for five or so days, then you crawl around as a caterpillar for a two to five weeks, and then you do that spinning death thing where you weave your own tomb for two weeks...and all that to live less than a month!
B:  So what is your point?  You sound like it is not worth the effort.  How much spinning have you done?  Do you know how quiet it can be in that thing you call a tomb?  It is there that we prepare for flight.  By the way have you ever flown?  O, I do not mean with one of your noise makers that you sit in.  I mean flown using that which the Creator endowed you with?  Don't stutter with false knowledge.  You make wings but you do not have wings.  Believe me, it's worth it.
M:  I am not sure what to say.
B:  That is a good beginning.
M:  I am not sure anyone is going to believe this conversation ever happened.
B:  Does it matter?  What matters is that you believe it.  Your world is so noisy.  You air is full of vibrations that clutter the breeze.  So much of what is in your noise is full of judgement and displeasure.  What happend to your kind?  Perhaps you need to rest on a leaf for a few days, and then crawl slowly around so as not to run through life; and yes, you perhaps need to risk the kind of rest that appears to be a nothing to the watching world but is in truth a kind of death to noise that leads to life.
M:  Where are you going?
B:  O, I'm not sure.  Where the breeze takes me I suppose.  Since you are so well read about butterflies you might want to remember what you learned about the Creator.  It all started with the breeze you know.  The Creator breathed and the breeze was formed.  That breeze filled everything.  I think in your language the word is "spirit."  Nice talking with you.  I better follow the breeze now because according to you I do not have much time.  But you see, my new friend, I have all the time in the world.  O, how I love the breeze.
M:  (silence)

Now What?

So I have known this was coming for years but now it is here.  It is called retirement.  As I look at the word on the screen it seems to be describing something that happens at a tire recapping place.  You know, they take what is old and put an extra layer on the old tired tire and send it back out for for some extra miles.

Well I am waiting for the recap but first I am allowed to absorb the first stage of this retirement thing.  So you take the middle of the word and make it as a response to all those "congratulations" I have been hearing.  "Congratulations," for these past few weeks at first  felt strange. What am I being congratulated for?  Did I just win something but missed it?

O, you mean I get a chance to recover for maybe being tired after 45 years of being a preacher?  I read that this first stage of retirement is called "extended vacation."  So I am kind of enjoying my "vacation."  Trouble is I am never sure what day it is..really.  I was told the other day by a friend of mine who experienced the same thing a few years ago when he retired that in the morning when I go out to pick up the newspaper I need to start noticing the day.  Ah, I have just learned my first lesson in living in this new world and space.

I am told that where I am is called liminal space.  Liminal is described as that place and space between times and is present when major transitions happen.  This all sounds good and accurate but it is also true.  My markers have disappeared, at least for a while.

Everyday seems like Friday.  That used to be my day off.  No, it does not feel like Saturday because for 45 years Saturday was the day before Sunday.  It was a party day for most folks but preachers learn real quick not to party too hardy on Saturday or there will be hell to pay.  Did I just write that?  Hey, I am retired I can say that now, can't I.  Well the truth is I said it before just not as loud.

So I shall enjoy my extended vacation for a while and try not to make all these Fridays into some form of Groundhog Day.  I mean today I am sitting here just writing away not sure where this is going.  It is not like I have to have three points and a poem or make sure I stay true to the text.  Gosh, this is kind of fun.

If you are reading this it must mean you have at least some leisure time to read something that you do not have to read.  Hi  there.  Join me for a moment in a brief liminal break.

But if you are not yet at the recap place I must remind you that I just checked the morning paper and it is not Friday.  That is okay because I learned long ago that if you pay attention everyday is a gift.  I want to not retire from that reality. 

I am going to write some more now on this blog since I have time and space.  I am watching the birds outside my window just now.  I am not just glancing at them like I use to before I had to get up and get with it.  I am actually watching them.  I feel like that scene in the movie "Men in Black" when the aging agent gets ready to be zapped in order to wipe out his memory of years of fighting intergalactic monsters.  He looks at his partner, hands him the zapping instrument, and just before he loses his memory he looks up at the stars and says, "They're beautiful aren't they!"

For years he has been employed because of what those stars have produced in the form of the challenge of dealing with visitors from the stars.  Now he is going to be zapped and will get the chance to see the stars as stars.

So as one who has worked with people for 45 years and yes has dealt with lots of people problems I simply say I look forward to looking at you with a smile on my face and say, "You know you are beautiful." 

Zap, wow what a great Friday.
Jody

Rip Van Winkle

So I know that I have been preoccupied with this transition called retirement but what did I miss in all the pathos filled goodbyes and celebrations?  I feel like some Rip Van Winkle who has awakened into another world.

A man who yells all the time and is famous for the "you're fired" way of defining people is up for President of the United States.  He loves to build towers with his name imprinted on them and he seems to wants be in the wall building business in order to keep all kinds of people out.  He appears to love the sound of slamming doors in the faces of whole groups of people especially those who define themselves by praying five times a day.

He quotes scripture but does not know what it means.  It is not "two Corinthians Donald." But even so Evangelicals are lining up behind him and not turning the other check but turning off their vision so that they will not truly see him or through him.

One observer of human behavior states that our brains are that which processes information but our minds are that part of us that ponders the meaning of information.  So I simply state that many of us seem to be the product of a reality where our brains have lost their minds.

And by the way where are our souls?  Our soul is that part of the human being that realizes that we are of one substance and the product of one maker.  Soul is a unifying element that recognizes the dignity of others in spite of the surrounding atmosphere of fear and anger.  Have we lost our souls and our minds?

Yes, I know the other major candidate seems to arouse suspicion and mistrust but what are our choices going to be when it comes to the mind and soul of our country?  The ring of "everything changed after September 11" has in part drowned out the reality that some things should not change.  Fear cannot be our ruling master.  Categorizing people and then demonizing them in order to gain some kind of control is both shortsighted and mean spirited.

We need soul and a mindful kind of thinking in the face of complex issues.  In the movie, "Avatar," the indigenous people have a deep relationship to each other and the very soil upon which they walk.  When they want to be known and desire to know one another one person says to the other, "I see you."  To see is to acknowledge the kinship to nature and to each other. 

Have we lost our ability to "see" each other.  We now see categories and labels.  I hope we can regain our minds and take care of our souls so that our vision will allow us to see a hope filled future.