Little Girls and Wedding Dresses

With the echo of "carry me" still hanging in the air she will walk down the isle in a few days in a wedding dress. Abigail liked to be "carried" as a child. There were those days when the carrying consisted of being lofted onto daddy's shoulders so she could see the world from on high.

Soon I will carry her down the isle, let go of her arm, take a small revolving step and change roles from dad to the one offering she and her "knight" the opportunity to join as one. What happened to the long dance recitals, the days of sneaking out her bedroom window, and the struggle to pass math (3 times) so she could finally get out of college?

All that will be part of her. The new "man in her life" will find that out if he does not already know. Those of us who have spoken sacred words in front of some guy holding a book know what the two whom I will stand before soon do not really know: no one knows what they are doing when they get married.

As Scott Peck once wrote, "if we call it falling in love....what happens when we get up?" Well...in this case it's called "marriage." It's lab work. It's hard. It's supposed to be. Everybody is hard to live with and there are not violins in the background to smooth things over because as the song says, "life is more than two hours long."

So, I'll walk her down the isle and remember how I used to carry her. She does not know what she is really doing but neither did I. Heck, I did not know how to be a parent either when that came along even though the old gentlemen who saw me staring through the hospital nursery window at the new creation that first day said to me, "Don't worry son they come with directions." Did you ever find any directions? I didn't.

Like with marriage, I learned as I went and usually learned the hard way and sometimes the painful, slow way. I've told her and she seemed to listen that there would be speed bumps and that when what I call "saddle sores" develop from the wear of marriage that it is wisdom that seeks some help outside the marriage. She seemed to "take it in."

So for now I'll "carry her" one last time down a path where we will make some new beginnings. She will be on my arm and not on my shoulders this time. It seems like such a short time ago that those small reaching arms asked me to be her support to see the world from on high.

I'll whisper a prayer to one who does see it all from "on high." Help her pay attention, Father. Give her courage to learn when the time comes. Show her what you do best: teach her how to forgive. Grant them a good measure of the best thing you ever give any of us: a love that continues to grow and expands by giving.

Bless you
jody jseymour@davidsonumc.org